Worthy Occupation

I’m sure we have all heard cliches about stay-at-home moms.  You know, the moms who “do nothing all day” because they “don’t work.” I have heard some women express that they would never be a stay-at-home mom because they just need to get out of their house.  Others want to utilize the degree they worked so hard to achieve.  We all have different personalities and circumstances which may cause a woman to seek work outside of the home, and there is nothing wrong with that.  I have been in that position myself.  When I was a single mom there was no way I could stay home with my daughter, I had to earn an income!  I applaud the moms that are keeping things in control both at a place of employment and at home.  It is not an easy task to balance all of those responsibilities!  All moms know that there is work to be done at home, but the world in which we live makes it seem like women who do not have any other form of employment are somehow lacking or oppressed.  However, women who are able and choose to stay at home are also choosing a worthy occupation.  They too should be recognized for the work that they are doing.

So what does a stay-at-home mom do all day?  Some of the things these moms do are what all moms are doing.  There are always dishes to be washed, laundry to be done, and a house that always could use a cleaning.  The more people there are in your house the more it seems like a never ending job.  Anyone at home with children under five will quickly learn to surrender certain standards they may have for a tidy home or how much they plan to accomplish in a day; however, as children grow and mature they are able to contribute help with the tasks that need to be accomplished.  Staying at home also allows me some flexibility on running errands.  I can go out for groceries or run to the bank in the middle of the day when there is less traffic, and elevate some of the congestion at the later times when many are coming home from work.  If there is a toddler meltdown day in progress, I often just push some of our errands to the next day.  I also have an amazing husband who will tease me about doing nothing as he runs the errand that simply can’t wait until tomorrow.  Staying home with my children has also allowed me the time to homeschool my children.  Not everyone would choose this path of education for their children, but it is what we found to be best for our family.  I am able to teach my children at their pace and choose a curriculum that best matches their learning style and interests.  I love the flexibility of choosing days off that match my husband’s schedule at work or a visit from grandparents who live out-of-town.  

Along with accomplishing household tasks, having more time to make yummy food, and having a flexible school schedule, one of the most compelling reasons I stay home is to have more time with my children.  Parents are the ones ultimately responsible before God for what their children are learning not only academically, but also spiritually.  I am home for my son’s growth and development milestones, but I am also the one teaching him how the world works.  I am a constant in my children’s lives.  I know them well from all of the time spent with them.  I am the person providing consistent discipline and structure to each and every day.  I grew up with a mom who was always there to put us on and off the bus.  She made sure we had lunch with us and that we came home to a house with snacks and dinner.  While my siblings and I attended school there was a comfort in knowing that mom was home.  If I got sick or hurt at school, I didn’t have to worry, they would call my mom.  If I was going on a field trip, my mom was usually available to go with us and share that amazing experience, which is something I really missed when my daughter was little. 

There are also some sacrifices that must be considered when mom stays home.  Some women long for human interaction beyond that of just their family.  They enjoy a job that will allow them that interaction.  For someone who is more outgoing or more job and goal oriented, it can be a sacrifice to give up those goals or slow their progress with a time period of being at home with their children.  There are also financial considerations.  Obviously a home with only one income will have less funds than one with two incomes.  Sometimes there are sacrifices that must be made in the budget to ensure we are living within our means.  Families with two incomes may be able to afford things we may need to curtail or do without.  This is where each family must evaluate their own needs and priorities.   

How does having mom at home benefit the family?  When mom is maintaining the house and calendar, it takes some of the stress off dad.  My husband can focus on work while he is at work, and he has more time to spend with his children when he gets home from work, if I am taking care of the cooking and other household chores.  Of course, my husband loves to cook as well, so that can also provide some good husband and wife time for us as we prepare food together.  Staying at home is a privilege that I do not take for granted.  I do not believe education is ever wasted, so I enjoy utilizing my education and degree for the benefit of my family.  I have found that allowing my career to be put on hold and spending more time at home with my children to be a worthwhile trade.  I know that this is not always an option for moms.  However, I would encourage every family to take a look at all of their options without immediately dismissing the idea of mom staying home!