Birthdays

Birthdays are crazy things.  Some people love them, some people hate them, and for some people it varies by year.  Some people have huge, elaborate celebrations, and others don’t celebrate at all.  As I approach another birthday I find contemplating how we approach growing older and how to embrace aging with grace.  Though it was originally a pagan tradition to celebrate birthdays, that does not make it inherently wrong to celebrate.  Birthdays are signposts in our lives and indicate the change from childhood to adulthood.  I believe birthdays are a great time to be thankful for the years and experiences that God has given us over the past years of our life.  

Birthdays signify a change in status.  In times of high infant mortality, the fact that an infant survived its first year was often a reason enough to celebrate.  Even today we still celebrate that first birthday moving them from infant to child.  In most ancient cultures, a birthday around 12-15 years of age signified the move from childhood to adulthood.  While this age now averages around 18 in most countries around the world, we still recognize this move to greater privilege and responsibility.  As fun as the celebrations and birthday parties can be, it doesn’t have to be an elaborate celebration.  One of my favorite birthday traditions is just going out to eat.  The person who has the birthday picks the restaurant, and we enjoy a meal together.  It’s not always fancy and my choices have changed as I’ve gotten older.  I used to love picking a restaurant that was my very favorite or served the food I loved the most.  Now, as a mom, I have also enjoyed picking a restaurant that I know others in my family will enjoy, even if it’s not necessarily my favorite.

In Titus 2:3-5 we read, “Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine.  They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.”  Who are these older women?  We know that they are women with greater experience, and presumably those who have been Christians for a while as well.  They have the experience of being a wife and mother that they can pass on to younger women who are just starting out.  As you age (both physically and in Christ), your responsibilities change.  We have an obligation to help other women learn how to be the women God has called them to be!  I currently find myself as an “older woman” who can help teach and disciple younger women but also someone who can turn to other women, older than myself, who can teach me as well.  It is to be a continual way of life that we never outgrow!

Embrace the life that God has given you.  Don’t wish away your birthdays.  I spent almost 5 years telling people I was “almost 13”.  I couldn’t wait to be older.  Then, when I reached 30, I wasn’t quite ready to admit to that age, and I began to understand why my Grammie always claimed to be 16.  However, we should rejoice in the years we have had, not wish them away.  The life and experiences that God has given to us have uniquely shaped us to teach and help others.  When a younger sister in Christ is struggling with something she is facing, I can use my past experiences to help encourage her in the faith and offer practical advice.  God puts the Church together in a way that allows each person to use their strengths for the good of the body.  We don’t all have the same experiences for a reason!  As the gray hairs begin to appear, we can embrace Proverbs 31:30, “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”  It’s not about the outward appearance, it’s about how God has shaped and fashioned our character.  

I find that I am writing this post as much to myself as to others.  I spent too many years thinking about what I wanted to do or accomplish in the future.  Too often I bemoaned what I haven’t accomplished or where I haven’t gone.  I plan on embracing this birthday to celebrate all of God’s past blessing in my life.  I am trying to live more present in each moment God has given rather than constantly looking to the future.  I will continue to seek to share what I have learned with others, especially those women younger than me, that they too may grown and learn.  I pray that I will continue to walk in the way of the Lord, that it may be said of me, “Gray hair is a crown of glory; it is gained in a righteous life.” (Proverbs 16:31)  I want to encourage others toward Christ as they learn from my life and experiences.