Blending Christmas

Most families have certain traditions they keep around Christmas time.  There is something special and comforting about keeping those traditions.  When a couple gets married, they often want to continue those traditions in their new home together.  Sometimes these transitions are seamless and fun; other times it becomes a holiday battle for the centuries.

When you are young, your parents determine your Christmas traditions.  These are the things you do every year and what seems "normal" to you.  It seems strange and fantastic to read about other cultures and other ways of celebrating that seem so foreign and strange to you.  In your young mind, the way your family celebrates is the only way you've ever known, and the only way you ever plan on celebrating.  Traditions are great for kids.  It not only gives them a sense of comfort and stability around the hectic holiday season, but it also gives them something to anticipate, which is half the fun!  Once you get married, things change.  You now have two families merging into one.  Keeping all the traditions or both can be quite a challenge if they don't overlap.

When you start a new family, start new traditions!  Talk about what you usually did and what you'd each really like to continue.  Do not feel bad if you have to miss some things you used to do.  As children enter your family, that may change your traditions even more.  We always used to go to my grandma's house for Christmas, but I rather enjoy having the day at home and the grandparents coming to us! When I was growing up, we were allowed to open just one small gift on Christmas Eve, and the rest had to wait until Christmas Day.  Now that tradition has gotten even more specific.  We have just one gift that the kids can open on Christmas Eve.  It is a game of some sort that we play together that day.  

You can also have traditions of giving.  Our family likes to use Christmas time to clear out old books, toys, and clothes that are no longer used.  Those that are in good shape are passed on to others in need.  We also enjoy caroling each year.  That often looks different as we have done Victorian Christmas Caroling in a town, caroling in nursing homes, and even traditional door-to-door.  There is just something about music and lights at Christmastime.  We are not much in the decorating department, so we try to make up the difference with the music.  

Whatever traditions you have, just remember, it's okay for them to change. It's okay if the baby needs a nap.  It's okay if you don't want to drag your kids hither and yon all day to friends and family.  It's okay if you try to accommodate the preference of your extended family; however, it is also okay to prioritize your immediate family and their needs.  Have a Merry Christmas with your family and a blessed new year!