A High Calling

Women are constantly told to find their worth, satisfaction, and purpose through employment and hobbies.  Women who stay home with their children are considered noble if their child has special needs or if it is a temporary situation.  Those who choose their home and motherhood over a career are seen to be oppressed, backward, or lazy.  As a child, I was told that I could be anything I wanted to be; however, it was stressed that my desire should be for something that could change the world.  The definition of the schools was very different from that of God’s Word.  They would say to change the world, I should cure cancer, invent something extraordinary, or make millions leading a major corporation.  God’s Word tells us that women are to work in their homes, love their husbands and children, respect their husbands, and teach their children to love and serve the Lord.  I can think of nothing more world-changing than that occupation.  

Psalm 127 praises the Lord for how He builds the home and family:

A Song of Ascents. Of Solomon.

Unless the LORD builds the house,

those who build it labor in vain.

Unless the LORD watches over the city,

the watchman stays awake in vain.

It is in vain that you rise up early

and go late to rest,

eating the bread of anxious toil;

for he gives to his beloved sleep.

Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD,

the fruit of the womb a reward.

Like arrows in the hand of a warrior

are the children of one’s youth.

Blessed is the man

who fills his quiver with them!

He shall not be put to shame

when he speaks with his enemies in the gate. 

Here we see that children are not only spoken of as a heritage or blessing from the Lord, but also numerous children are valued.  We should desire that the Lord build our house and fill it with many children.  Rather than taking control, we should allow God to use our bodies as He deems fit.  May we be vessels of blessing to our husbands that we have as many children as the Lord sees fit.  I also want to note that this attitude and approach to childbearing does not necessarily mean a family of ten or more children.  I know several families that did not have any children, only had a few due to the cost of adoption, or are raising only a few children remaining here on earth.  Trust that God is in control, and His plans are perfect.

In Proverbs 31, we are given an example of an “excellent wife”.  There are many things that this woman does.  I often read it and think that I could never measure up.  There are many ways that a woman adds to the value of the family.  First, we see that she trusts her husband and does him good.  She is sure that he is spoken well of by others.  She works with her hands to provide food and clothing for her whole household.  It even says, “She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens.” (vs. 15)  She buys and sells, and “does not eat the bread of idleness.” (vs. 27)  Not only is she working hard and caring for her home, but she is also generous, and gives to those in need.  Ultimately, we see that this woman is to be praised for her fear of the Lord and good works.  A woman who stays home does not “do nothing”.  Multiple full-time jobs encompass the work of a “stay-at-home mom”.  Along with all the practical aspects of keeping a home clean and maintained, she is also feeding and clothing her family, keeping track of everyone’s schedules, appointments, and activities.  She is both the heartbeat and the operation center of the home.  Most importantly, she is investing time in her children rather than having them cared for by someone else.  While caregivers can be good and loving, and sometimes necessary, no one can care for them like their mother.  While fathers are responsible before God for their children’s spiritual development and education, mothers can be key contributors as they spend more time with the children while fathers are at work.

We can see that bearing children and working at home are noble callings, but is it necessary?  In Titus 2:3-5 we read, “Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.”  This seems to indicate that working at home is a key part of a woman’s life.  They may find additional employment, maybe working from their home, as is mentioned in Proverbs 31.  However, the primary concern should be caring for their home and family.  Notice that the excellent wife in Proverbs 31 does not engage in business at the expense of her family or household.  It says that she rises early and stays up late.  If you are working in additional employment, it will consume time and should not take away from your responsibilities at home.  If possible, I would urge you to seek out a way to stay home with your children.  It is a surprisingly low income that would allow your family to survive.  You may have to give up some wants or “extras”, but most families can survive on one income.  You have to consider what is of utmost importance.  Our family sees the value of being the primary caregivers of our children, as well as their teachers through homeschooling, to outweigh anything else that clamors for our attention.

Motherhood is a high calling.  Whether you are still waiting for that opportunity, in the midst of the sleepless nights, enjoying the fun of childhood, navigating the tricky waters of puberty, or watching them spread their wings and fly, this year is for you.  Let us focus on what a godly mother looks like at all ages and stages.  Let us consider how the Church can surround and support mothers in their most noble calling, and let us encourage one another on this journey.